Filler

I have so, so much to catch up on at work today, and no doubt even MORE to catch up on by the time I get home, so let’s do a recap of my long weekend. Oh don’t worry, it’s all kinds of exciting.

Friday: husband leaves early a.m., he’s not gone from the driveway 30 seconds before I notice two blisters on the baby’s hand with burns. Awesome. (she’s fine. scabbed up and gross and completely annoyed by bandaids- wheee! no, we don’t know how she did it. Weird.) We got to do 18 month shots at the pediatrician, and then home to a mess which I’m inclined to clean since I’m the only one looking at it for days. Dinner turns into a mess, I vow to be better tomorrow. Beer, bed, the end.

Saturday: girls wake up in terrible mood, we’re not even out of bed and someone has kicked someone and both someones are whining. Coffee. Maë’s hand is incredibly gross, we call off a photoshoot and stay in. Nanna comes to pick up children (thank standard and infant size jesuses for grandparents.) I proceed to go thrifting. Sans children. 1.5 straight hours. Awesome. Then I spend the night hemming pants, dancing pantsless in my basement to Justin Bieber & friends, drinking beer and chatting on the internets. In a word: amazeballs. Best night in a long time.

Sunday: wake up 9:30am (<- zomg!) to a picture of a dead deer on my phone. Happy for husband and tummy, sad for my eyes which cannot unsee. In a sorry attempt at ‘relaxing’, I instead putz around the house randomly cleaning ALL THE THINGS and then…because I’m wildly impatient: changing the girls’ rooms around so Annika is now in with Maëlle. Out to my parents’ for dinner & picking up of children that I really had started to miss. Bella has meldown a mere 10 minutes after my arrival and theeeeeeeere. That’s life as I know it.

Monday: super-dee-dooper morning with purple chocolate-chip pancakes and bus drop offs and high fives all around! Take shower. Break shower handle. BREAK SHOWER HANDLE. WATER EVERYWHERE. PANIC. CRY. RUN NAKED AROUND HOUSE. (Ladies? I cannot stress to you enough: know where shit is in your house. Do you know how to turn off the water? I didn’t. Now I do. And I can do it sobbing with a towel wrapped around my body. Win.) Take some time off from the chaos, take pictures of my niece in the park, it’s raining. Back to my house to hang out with my sister-in-law for a split second before they’re all back to Newfoundland for months again. Cut to my brother, my dad & my mom swooping in to save the day and fix my broken shower. Four hours of work later, when my brother had been away from home for going-on-14-hours, I have a fully-functional shower, water turned back on. All is well. I bail halfway through reading a book to the Ladies, apologize that Mommy just doesn’t have it in her, break their little hearts, put them to bed, pour myself onto the couch and into Tweetdeck. Brandy and Ryan save the day. Naturally. I rediscover my Pinterest candy vodka challenge (don’t worry, I’ll blog about it. It’s a HUGE win.) and am 100% pleased with it mixed with KoolAid.

Tuesday: at work. Blissfully so. Hate me if you want, it’s easier here. Tonight when I go home my daughters will run to the door to see me with smiles and stories and minimal attitude. Thank you, self. For being brave enough to admit you’re better at motherhood when you’re working.

(If you’re even considering leaving a douchebag comment about how you can’t imagine not wanting to be home with your babies? There’s a tiny red X at the top corner of this page, find your way out…and here’s a broomstick to shove up your ass on the way.)

Friends? Tell me something lovely about your weekend. Please?

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3 thoughts on “Filler

  1. No lie…all day Sunday I kept thinking “I’m so glad I’m going back to work tomorrow”. My kid was driving me BONKERS! I totally think I’m a better mom because I work.

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